My Child Doesn't Want to See the Other Parent Alone — Can I Ask for Supervised Parenting Time? Markham Chinese Divorce Lawyer: You Can Ask

Your child says they don’t want to be alone with the other parent. The other side says no to your plan. You’ve already filed. Can you ask the court for supervised parenting time?

Yes, you can ask. But it’s not automatic just because you ask.

Two separate issues here. One is who cares for the child and how visits work — the court only looks at the child’s best interests. The other is whether someone else needs to be there. The child not wanting to go alone is a factor, not the deciding vote.

No restraining order, child just says they don’t want to go alone — will the court order supervision?

Usually not.

With no restraining order and no evidence the child is at risk, just the child saying they don’t want to go alone — the court rarely orders supervision. Supervision is the exception, not the normal setup.

What is enough? Family violence or risk of it, risk of abduction, alcohol or drug abuse, or not having seen the child for a long time and needing to reintroduce. Just “I don’t want to go” doesn’t get there.

There’s already a restraining order — how does the court usually handle visits?

With a restraining order, temporary visits are usually supervised. The child still sees the other parent, but the two adults don’t meet — a third person is there, or visits happen at a set centre.

A restraining order is about the adults — who can’t go near whom. It doesn’t mean the other side loses parental rights. It’s not zero visits, and it’s not handing the child over alone to the restrained parent.

How does the court actually listen to the child? Does age matter?

Yes, age matters first, but the law doesn’t set a fixed age.

If the child is very young, the court usually won’t call them to testify. If you write in your affidavit “my child told me they don’t want to go,” the court treats that as your words, not the child’s. Very young kids can’t tell the difference between “I’m uncomfortable” and “I’m siding with the parent who brought me.”

For teenagers, the court will listen. The Office of the Children’s Lawyer, a Voice of the Child report — those work. But listening doesn’t mean ruling that way. The court still looks at whether what they say is clear, steady, informed, and whether someone coached them. It’s not “the child says it, the court does it.”

Decaen v. Decaen, 2013 ONCA 218 lists what to look at: who can care for the child, whether the child knows what they’re talking about, age, maturity, how strong and how long the wish has been, whether it’s workable, whether a parent influenced them, and the whole picture. Age is just one item.

I say my child doesn’t want to go vs. a third party saying it — which works better?

Third party works better.

You and the other side are both parties, each with your own story. The judge can’t figure out what the child really thinks from your fighting WeChat messages. Your chat logs at most show you fought — that’s it.

The court trusts third parties more: psychologist, social worker, the Office of the Children’s Lawyer, a Voice of the Child report, and records already at the school or family doctor.

They don’t just write down whatever the child says either. They check whether it’s consistent, whether someone rehearsed it with them, whether the age backs it up.

If there’s violence, stalking, losing control in front of the child — go for a restraining order first. Once it’s in place, visits usually go supervised. You don’t need to put the child through a court fight over one sentence — that’s a lot of pressure on a kid.

Can a family member just stay in the room — does that count as supervised parenting time?

It can, but it’s not supervision in the full sense. The court can agree to it.

Real supervision is at a set centre, with a neutral person there, on the record. That’s supervised parenting time in the strict sense.

You staying there, or a brother or sister staying there — the court sometimes agrees, but the other side will say the child can’t build a real relationship with you watching. The court rarely makes “mom or dad must sit next to them” a long-term order.

If your child doesn’t want to see the other parent alone, sort out age, evidence, and safety risk first. Book an initial consultation (30 minutes, $220+HST). Call 647-930-6688.

This is general legal information only. Not legal advice. No lawyer-client relationship.